South America 1989: Lost in Lima

I got off the bus at 8.30am with a backpack, a day pack and a phone number for Manuel's uncle Pancho. We had just flown from Sydney to Santiago, then split up – he had flown and I had come by bus, 3000km north to Lima.

My first problem would have been finding a token for the public phone - in Peru you need to buy 'RIN' tokens to use payphones. Street vendors everywhere sell them so it would not have taken long to find one.

I called the number in my notebook, and a lady answered, in Spanish of course. I asked for Pancho Duharte, and the response, fast and dismissive was "Wrong number". I guessed I had misdialled, so I bought another few tokens and tried again. I got the same lady - I asked her if she spoke English and we got a little further, but it was clear this was not the right number.

I looked around for a phone book but there wasn't one. 25 years on I don't recall exactly what happened next, but by lunchtime I had humped my gear to the Plaza San Martin, and settled into a table at the Restaurant Versailles. The manager was a tall man in his sixties named Eloy, and he was very warm and friendly. He had some English, and I was able to explain my predicament.

There was a public phone in there and some ten-year old phone books. This was really a shock - I had always assumed that anywhere there are phones, there will up-to-date phone books. I rang six or eight F. Duhartes (Pancho is the diminutive for Francisco), but I got nowhere.

I thought I might be able to get Manuel's contact details from the immigration officials. I asked around about this, and I was advised to ask out at the airport where he had arrived. I took a cab out there and started asking questions. I had a photocopy of Manuel's passport, but this just aroused suspicion. Why was I claiming this man who was obviously Peruvian was an Australian citizen? Look, it even says here place of birth: Lima. It gradually dawned on me that I was getting nowhere, and in fact I now had nowhere to sleep.

Back at the Versailles Eloy recommended a hotel, and I took a taxi there. It was in a fancy district not far from the US embassy, but its was pretty basic and I was exhausted so sleep wasn't a problem. In the morning I checked out and returned to the Versailles.

I had a backup plan, but it was going to be expensive; phoning Australia to speak to Manuel's mum. Eloy minded my gear while I went to the international telephone centre.

To make international calls most people in Peru used a place like this. A cashier took my money (it cost me $US20 per call) and the phone number I wanted to ring, then I sat in the waiting area for my name to be called. Then I went to a numbered booth, picked up the phone and was speaking to first a Peruvian operator, then Australian.  Lima is 15 hours behind Hobart, and for some reason I had to make my call in the small hours of Hobart time. I had decided to call my Dad, and give him the job of ringing Mrs Duharte at 3am to explain the problem.  I thought that if I rang her there might be some expensive hang ups and call backs, whereas if I called Dad twice an hour apart at least I knew he should be able to get the job done in that time.

It cost me $40 of the $650 I had budgeted for the whole 3 months, but at least it worked. When I phone back Dad had the correct number, and more importantly an address as well. I went back to Eloy beaming with delight, and called Pancho. He put me on to Manuel and I explained where I was and what had happened.

I was overwhelmed with gratitude to Eloy for his hospitality which had meant so much to me in my difficult situation. I thanked him as best as I could and took a taxi up Avenida Salaverry to the suburb of Jesús Maria, where I fell into the arms of the extended Duharte clan, where I would stay for the next month.

During that time I had plenty of opportunities to visit Eloy, patronise his etsablishment and introduce my mysterious disappearing friend, Manuel. Below is my journal entry for Lima.



Lima is a city of around 8 million people. 5 million live in the pueblos jovenes, literally the young towns. There is no electricity, sewerage, telephone or other government services. Travelling out of Lima by train brings you into the heart of the poverty. The main outlet roads are surrounded by a veneer of respectability, but nothing separates the shantytowns from the railway line. The houses are made of woven dried palm leaves, cardboard, fibro etc. Children throw rocks at the trains. 

When I look around the outskirts of Lima now, its pretty tidy and organised compared to what I wrote above in 1989. For instance the fire hydrant in the image above is a sign of municipal pride and progress. 25 years ago I saw a lot of areas like these in Tacna. 

The predominant car in Lima is the VW Beetle. I would conservatively estimate that 25% of cars are Beetles. 50% of taxis are Beetles. We were catching a lot of taxis, because it meant you didn’t get lost, and they were quite cheap (though later when the money was running low I was more circumspect about just jumping in a cab). After a while, just for fun, I was trying each time to get a more decrepit cab than the time before. None of them have indicators, so that was my starting point. I caught one with no indicators and no mirrors. Soon I was taking cabs with no indicators, mirrors, windscreen, boot lid, rear doors or glove box. But they all have working horns, and Jesus or Virgin Mary decals. Every car in Lima has a fully functional horn, sometimes several. Often they play Colonel Bogey, or something. Peruvians drive very aggressively, and have a finger on the horn constantly. Beep means “Turning left”, “Turning right”, “I’m stopping”, “Get out of the way” and also “I’m just glad to be alive and Peruvian”. 

A classic example. Still on the street and available for hire. Pic by F. H. Ehrenberger

Cars keep to the right in South America. When Limeños want to turn left, and someone else in front is waiting to turn left, they don’t queue behind them. They get up along side them, sometimes four or five abreast. If someone coming the other way wants to turn left at the same intersection, they nudge their way into the same scrum. Soon there may be ten cars lined up facing in different directions, waiting for a gap, revving their engines. When the gap appears, it is like the flag dropping at the start of a Grand Prix, as they burn rubber to get into it.

The sky in Lima is grey for ten months of the year, and the temperature is between 20° and 25° The fog is called the garua. It almost never rains. We stayed with Manuel’s uncle Pancho Duharte, aunt Susana, and cousins Lorena and Panchito. They have a two storey house in Avenida Salaverry, in the suburb of Jesus Maria. The kitchen is open to the sky. It did actually rain one night when we were there, a very rare event. I bought some cheap watercolours and did some paintings in the kitchen. With all that natural light, it made a great studio.

The Duharte residence. Panchito runs his business from downstairs these days.

As I was walking out of the shop where I bought the watercolours, the owner was closing for siesta. He bought the iron grille down on my head, but was very apologetic. Everyone is very security minded. All shops have grilles and security alarms. Many buildings have conspicuous armed guards loitering out in the street in front. Weapons are either big and menacing, or, if small, unholstered and waved around to achieve an equal deterrent effect.

The sewer system of Lima is totally stuffed. Because of water shortages, toilets worked on a small trickle of water. Toilet paper is therefore thrown in a special bin instead of into the bowl. This freaked me out, but I have since learned that this is the way of things all over the world.

With no rain, everyone has flat roofs, which they make the most of. Susana’s laundry is on the roof. There is a good view from up there of the surrounding suburbs, the massive hospital and government buildings nearby, and the incredible goings on in the traffic. Jesus Maria is a fairly solid middle class area. Pancho is a bootmaker, employing about eight people. When he is carrying the payroll from the bank to his workshop, he wraps it around his body under his shirt, so he doesn’t appear to be carrying much.

The Duhartes are blancos - pure Spanish blood. The majority of the population are mestizos, mixed Indian and Spanish blood. The Duhartes worry about the millions living in poverty in the pueblos jovenes. They think that once they get organised, they will flood into the city and the army will be hopelessly outnumbered. This is a common feeling, and explains why so much of the national budget is spent on internal police and military strength. The fight against the Maoist terror organisation Sendero Luminoso is the other reason. Since we left Peru their leader Dr. Abimael Guzman has been captured. The terrorists are trying to extort his release by attacking civilians and tourists targets as well as the more common military and paramilitary targets.

Once when I was in the main plaza, I was approached by a young guy who asked where I was from, and had a bit of a chat, and then tried to sell me marijuana. I said no and took off quickly before I was framed up for something. Later, when I was out on the town with Manuel, Pancho and his friends, we ran into the guy again - he was a mate of José’s or something.

Pancho and Lorena’s friends were all quite well off young students or professionals. Many of them had been to the USA, or at least learned to speak American English. Manuel and I were often told how clever we were, speaking three languages (English, Spanish and Australian). One night we went out with them to a big dance hall by the beach, called Canta America. Down two sides were cafe tables and chairs everywhere, crowding the edge of a long dance floor. At either end of the dance floor was a big stage. There were three bands on the night we were there - as one would finish at one end, the next began at the other end. The first band were a small salsa band, singing in Spanish. Next was a big band, doing swing, salsa and rhumba gear - all the kids got into it just as much as the older people.

The ages were about 16 to 60. The last band did Police covers in phonetic English. Eg ‘So loo-loo-loo-loo-loonly without yo’. There were three bars.

The Peruvian kids were generally great dancers. They taught us to salsa, which for us meant mostly standing around pouting and looking mean while the girls danced around us, interspersed with some pretty close cuddly moves. Just for the hell of it, Manuel and I tried to teach them to jump up and down and pump their fists, the way Australian kids dance, but they couldn’t get into it.

Miraflores is the new centre of Lima. The old city is completely decrepit, dirty and uncared for by the Government, apart from the presidential palace, the old cathedral and a few other landmarks.

My favourite place in the old city was the Plaza San Martín, because it was easy to find, had cheap places to eat, no armed idiots, lots of taxis and usually something interesting going on.

In Miraflores, things were pretty different. Begging was discouraged with a bit of boot and baton work to the back of the head.

People there flaunted their wealth, whereas in the city, people took off their watches to go out in the street. We went to lunch once with some of Manuel’s relatives, and they brought their car stereo in with them, so no-one would break into their car.

There is a craft market in the evening in Miraflores. Plenty of jewellery, that’s all I can remember. In the old city, the whole city is a market. Everywhere people are sitting on the footpath, or on folding chairs. Some have a well organised spread of interesting looking stuff, some have a few pencils, a few avocados and a hair dryer for sale. Some have nothing - they just sit with their children around them with their hands out. 

Beggars were a new experience for me. At first I was making eye contact with them all the time, and when you do that it is very hard to not give them something. But I was on such a tight budget, I couldn’t afford to keep doing that. I ended up giving something very small about once a day, but resolving to take a real interest in the country and its’ problems when I got home. I’ve actually done nothing.

Some of the streets east of the Plaza San Martin are given over to special markets, such as books, or plumbing supplies, or electrical gear. The things you can buy at any market are; RIN phone tokens, warm Coke and Inca Kola, Sublime chocolate bars and Suave toilet paper.

There are no beggars in sight these days. Everyone in these pictures is pretty busy going somewhere, doing something. 

There is a pedestrian street in Miraflores called Calle Pizza, which is all pizza and pasta restaurants. As you walk along, waiters pull out chairs, beckon, smile, turn and head inside waving for you to follow, or just thrust a menu into your hands.

Manuel and I had pizza at another restaurant in San Ysidro, with his Uncle Oscar. The restaurant was in a very swish shopping centre, full of leather, furs and brushed aluminium. There were some children begging outside the front door, which was guarded by the usual brutish types. I made the mistake of meeting the eyes of one boy, who then tried to follow us in. One of the guards simply coshed him on the back of the head with his truncheon, and dragged him out by the arm.

This was Manuel's family's neighbourhood church when they lived in San Ysidro.

Not terribly bright

Winston forgets things sometimes, like how to sit on the stairs. Suddenly his front legs don’t seem long enough for the job. “I'm ... er ... at a funny angle and I don’t know why”.

August arrives with snow

It must be time for my annual snow pictures.

South America 1989: Gormless tourist on the moon

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View Larger Map

I have just added StreetView to my iPad, because I love cruising the mean streets of Mexico, Brazil and Rumania. I was bumbling about in Paraguay when I accidentally dropped the little guide man on the Pan American Highway on the Chilean coast. Then suddenly; I realised I was looking at a place I had actually been.  The most moon-scapey place I have ever been, and yes I have spent time in Queenstown. The Atacama Desert of coastal Chile and Peru is something else. Note; the top scene here is Chile (white lines), the lower one Peru (yellow lines). These spots are something like 700km apart. And in between is… pretty much the same.

This was my first trip overseas. Manuel and I flew from Sydney to Santiago on our way to Lima, Peru. He had more money to throw around than I, so he flew up the coast to LIma while I went all the way by bus, changing buses at the border. I was 21 years old, had a smattering of night school Spanish, and I was extremely gormless. I have just realised that next month is the 25th anniversary of our trip.

The two bus rides together took 40 hours. A large stretch of it went through the desert. You hear a lot these days about how deserts are actually full of LIFE and VARIETY and so on. This one is just your classic empty sandblasted sandsville. Silver grey sand stretches from the ocean as far as you can see inland, usually to the line of sandhills not far from the road. Now and then you see small groups of tiny huts. The only colour is Chilean flags flying from almost every possible spot.

Streetview screen grab. More pics here or just go to Google Street view itself obviously!

Here is my diary and a couple of drawings from the bus ride.

This story starts in Santiago. When planning, we had decided that we would split up there, and meet up again three days later in Lima. I was on a tighter budget than Manuel, and I couldn’t justify flying when the bus was one fifth the price.

The bus left Santiago at about six in the evening, and headed north on the Pan American Highway. The Pan American stretches from Tierra del Fuego to Alaska, with the only break in Panama due to the impassable Darien Gap.

I was sitting next to a serious young man named Bernardo. We kept to ourselves until, when we were well out in the desert, I asked him if he would mind me taking a photo (he had the window seat). We started talking then, I told him where I was from and where I was going. He was the first South American I spoke to at any length. He was a student in Santiago, travelling to Calama I think.

I was headed for Arica, on the Chile/Peru border. This was supposed to take 28 hours (followed by 22 hours the next day from the border to Lima).

I was captivated by the desert, as I had never seen one before. There are areas in the Atacama desert that have never in recorded history had rain. I have always been fascinated by the idea of such massive empty spaces, and had often painted such scenes at art school. There wasn’t the dead flat horizon of my paintings, but the emptiness was mind-boggling. I spent hour after hour just staring out the window at the panorama.
In places images have been formed by arranging dark stones on the lighter sand. Some massive examples date back to extinct pre-conquest tribes, but there are many smaller religious words and images and people’s names.

Much of the time we were travelling along the Pacific coast. One place sticks in my memory, called Gran Playa. It was a flyblown truck stop. There was all kinds of rubbish sticking out of the sand, half buried. Across the road from the grubby restaurant was about 400 meters of “beach”. It was just the same as the ground on the inland side of the road, but it had waves crashing on it. If the bus had waited, I’d have liked to walk down to the water and look back at Gran Playa and the vastness that surrounded it.

The drawing [above] was done two months later, passing through the same area in the other direction. Santiago is at the same latitude as Sydney, Arica about the same as Rockhampton. I’d never been further north in my life than Gosford, so the intensity of the sun was not something I was used to. It glinted fiercely off passing cars, and even the grey-yellow sand and rocks seemed to reflect back pure white.

The desert is chock-full of valuable minerals. It was formerly Peruvian and Bolivian territory, which the Chileans captured in the War of the Pacific in 1883.
Calama has the largest copper mine in the world, and mining is all that really goes on in northern Chile. Originally they mined nitrates, but when synthetic nitrates were invented in WW2, they came to rely on copper.

The Chilean bus was quite comfortable. It cost around US$30 for the trip. The trip was overnight, and a steward went down the aisle putting everyone’s seats back at about 9 o’clock. The same steward went down the aisle waking evryone and giving them a cup of wierd tea and a roll at about 7 o’clock the next morning. That afternoon they showed a video - a black and white bedroom farce apparently made in Argentina.

We stopped in Valparaiso, Copiapo, Antofagasta and Iquique on the way. I can only remember the stop at Antofagasta. We drove through the suburbs to the bus company’s terminal. It was hot and dusty, and the whole town smelled of fish. I sat with Bernardo and ate, probably chicken I think. I ate a lot of chicken on the trip, because it was plentiful everywhere and likely to be fresh. It was usually quite tasty too.

The company's bus station was up here in the hills above the port of Antofagasta.

I said goodbye to Bernardo and continued with the bus to Arica. It was around nine pm when we arrived. The desert sunset had been spellbinding, but the darkness fell quickly. I remember seeing the lights of Arica, and travelling along a modern expressway into the city. The bus terminal was over the river from the area where I wanted to stay. I felt a little scared, but I decided to walk and see a bit of the town. It was Saturday night. Several streets were blocked off, and there were many young people wandering around. Music floated through the warm air from many different dance halls and clubs.

I found the Residencial Nuñez in Calle Maípu. They had no free rooms, but they had one that was occupied by a shift worker. They rented it out to someone else at night at a cheaper rate. The SA on a Shoestring describes the Nuñez as “dreary”. It was very basic, but it had hot water - it cost around one dollar per night.

I wanted to take a photograph of Señora Nuñez with the Jesus and Mary teatowel hanging over the reception desk. My accent was and is terrible, and something I said made her look worried and annoyed. I think I said “camera”, because it sounds like one of those words that is basically the same in both languages. She may have thought I said “camela” which means “flirt”. I should have said “maquina fotographia” or just “foto”. When she cottoned on to my meaning, she sat at her desk and gave me a huge smile. I don’t have the photo - the film was in my pack when it was stolen 2 months later.

Calle Maípu in Arica - the Residencial Nuñez ius no longer listed.

The next day I shouldered my pack and headed downtown to find the train station. There is a short railway from Arica to Tacna, the first town on the Peruvian side. It is generally better to cross a border on a bus or train than on foot, or in a private car or taxi. Your driver and fare collector do the same trip every day, and know the border guards and the procedure. If there are any bribes to be paid, the company usually does it and factors it into the ticket price. It is a much neater may of ensuring you get over OK than giving the sergeant a few bills on the spot to give you an entry stamp.

Because it was Sunday the train wasn’t running - that left me the choices of a walk back to the bus terminal for an international bus, taking a colectivo (an irregular minibus/taxi) or waiting another day. Because I was in a hurry to rejoin Manuel, I decided to get a colectivo to Tacna.

First I did a bit of sightseeing. Arica is dominated by the Morro de Arica, a big headland (notable because it doesn’t have a giant cement Jesus erected on it.) I walked around the shore below the Morro, and sat under an equestrian statue to watch big pelicans diving for fish in the water. I’m not sure who the statue was - it could have been San Martin, Bolivar, Grau, Pierola, O’Higgins or Salaverry, but probably Grau. Everything in South America is named after one of these people, from countries to soccer teams to hamburgers. 

The plaza by the Morro de Arica

While I was staring out to sea a young man approached and asked me for a cigarette. He assumed I was an American, and wanted to practise his English on me. His name was Alejandro, and he told me he was an orphan. His parents had died in an air crash, and he cried as he told me about it. Then he told me he hadn’t eaten for three days. I doubted a lot of his story, but when I bought him some empanadas, he gobbled them so fast he was choking. Empanadas are like a meat pie that is all pastry and salt, with a bit of meat accidentally left in.

We sat outside a cafe for a while, and he told me about what had happened in Chile in the last ten years. He said a lot of people were prepared to forget about the disappearances and other human rights abuses because the Pinochet regime had turned the Chilean economy around, and had inflation under control. (I later heard Peruvians say that they needed someone like Pinochet to fix their economy and crush the Shining Path. Alejandro volunteered the information that he hated Pinochet - I never heard anyone else voice an opinion.

I got up to find a moneychanger, as I had run out of pesos. Alejandro insisted I follow him to where I would get a better exchange rate, I think he wanted me to tip him. I decided to get rid of him, and said “This is not a very good rate at all - you’ve taken me out of my way for nothing”. He skulked away, and I took my pesos to where the colectivos gather. There were three ladies and a man looking for one more person to share their colectivo across the border, so I joined them.

Looking back at Chile at the Chile-Peru border.
So far, 2069km by bus and 22km by colectivo. Still nearly 1000km to Lima.

My first border crossing went well, except: when we were in no man’s land, I suddenly said “I think I left a plastic bag on the ground at the last checkpoint”. The driver briefly panicked, until he realised where we were. It is illegal to stop or turn around between a border marker and a checkpoint. We were between the Chilean marker and the Peruvian marker, and out of sight of either checkpoint, so he stopped and unlocked the boot - my bag was right there.

We drove into Tacna, Peru, and I changed my pesos and some dollars into intis. The rate was then 3300 intis to the dollar. The peso rate in Tacna was very poor; the pesos I had paid a dollar for over the border were now worth about 2600 intis. Travelling towards a border, you always have to tread a fine line between ensuring sufficient funds and getting stuck with nearly worthless currency. I changed my watch as well as my money - Peru is one hour behind Chile.

I didn’t feel very comfortable in Tacna, and I decided to just sit on my pack for the two hours before the next bus to Lima. I tried talking to a man who was also waiting, but he spoke too rapidly.

One of the older parts of Tacna ...

.. and one of the up-and-coming newer parts of Tacna.

The Peruvian bus was a rattletrap compared with the Chilean version. The passengers seemed to mostly be smuggling Chilean goods into Peru. Tacna seemed to be some sort of free trade zone, possible because it was Chilean territory from the War of the Pacific until 1929 (as a legacy it still has the highest education standard in Peru). The bus was stopped and searched twice by the customs police (who looked like the army - maybe they were the customs army). I was sitting next to a woman who had lots of silver jewellry sewn into the hem of her skirt - she showed me. Another man had a radio, which he hid in a crate of bananas when we were searched, but played at top volume and sang along to the rest of the time.

The bus to Lima went via Arequipa, Nazca, Ica and Pisco, but I can’t remember any of my impressions then - I saw them all again later. It was probably dark. I  remember dreaming that I was sitting next to Pippa, our labrador who had died a year earlier, and feeling very content just to sit next to her. I woke up and realised it was the woman with the jewellery leaning against me.

We arrived in Lima at 8.30 am. Ten minutes later I was lost. (To be continued)

Antisocial August

I have been drawn ever deeper into Twitter over the last year (and to a lesser extent Facebook). This social media engagement has ramped up since I bought an iPad, as a tool to work on a mobile-platform project that has since stalled. I did not buy it to sit on all evening exchanging smirky views with football fans and comedians that I have never met. And yet that is how I spend my time, increasingly.

I have sent nearly 8000 tweets since I joined in 2008 - some of them have been a quick response, but for some of them I have actually done research. Many's the time I have been about to fire off a statement or reply, and then thought "I'll just check that on Wikipedia", or even "I have the exactly right pic to illustrate that, I just need to find it".

And then there is the time you spend taking your 165 character tweet and whittling it down to fit the 140 character limit.

So influenced by my social media circle (namely @pmattessi and @jmac) I am giving it all up for August. I am not donating money to anything or expecting to be made a better person. I do not feel that my addiction is harming my loved ones. I just want to see how I go.

If you are on Twitter I am @4boat  and I promise I will be back in September so feel free to follow me.

I will continue blogging here and also at TTBB, where I try to direct all my footy-related thoughts nowadays. 

And just to blow that particular trumpet, here's a sample of the terrific supportive community I will be missing over the next month.

I like @dugaldjellie's writing - all whimsy, reverence and longing. But @4boat takes the prize this week... http://t.co/kY7kqE5O3Q
— FootyMaths Institute (@Footy_Maths) July 28, 2014

Thursday in Tomahawk

Having taken the wave ski on the roof all the way up there, Thursday was our last roll of the dice to get some use out of it. I thought we should try Tomahawk, about 30km east of Bridport. I remembered it being a very flat beach from when I was there with Dad about 30 years previously.

Fortunately it was a superb day, just perfect. Sunny and no wind, although it can be a very windy spot. The coast goes NE in a great sweeping curve, and out in front of us on Cape Portland we could actually see the wind farm. At first I counted 13 turbines but later in the day when the sun was behind us, I saw more like 30 or 40.

Cape Portland (not the view from the beach)

This IS a view from Tomahawk beach but not my photo (thanks GrahamBarker.com).
Packing for the day I forgot that the iPad was my camera on this trip, and just thought "beach, iPad, nope".

So I have no photos of each of us taking a turn in the wave ski, or of Winston rushing out bravely to “save’ us then remembering that waves are scary and turning tail for the sand.

Michael is not a strong swimmer and has been a less than enthusiastic paddler in the past, but he had a good go and even got straight back in when dumped. Marcus is actually more proficient than me now in the surf - I was dumped time after time as I just couldn’t think straight in the moment. Kept putting the wrong blade of the paddle in as I was slewing sideways, making it worse instead of righting the ship.

Elf had a good long go took we all enjoyed it enormously. One reason I think Michael doesn’t paddle much is that unlike us, he doesn’t get bored when it’s not his turn. He is extremely happy just poking at the sand making little dams and dykes.

I bought us lunch at the caravan park shop. I ordered six spring rolls, thinking they would be like the Vietnamese ones, about finger size. Of course they were Marathon Spring Rolls which are essentially off-brand Chikos, the same size. I had to eat four of them.

So the perfect end to the day was a very long walk.  We walked along to the river and back. Black cockatoos were nesting near where we parked the car. I was very tired on the drive home and actually thought I was sunburnt, but didn’t seem so the next day.

Lavender with everything

Note to self - learn to take photos with the iPad without fogging half the lens.

On Wednesday we made a beeline for Bridestowe Lavender Farm. As you can see it’s not the most impressive time of year to visit - that would be in January when it looks like this;

This pic is one of several beauties on Ross Tours website.

Even in July the place is beautiful; the contoured rows are very handsome. They don’t need to irrigate at all - the site was carefully chosen for its soil type and rainfall. Having learned this, it was a real shock to see that the original bush surrounded the farm is scraggiest you'll see, and the soil looks spectacularly unpromising.

85% of their lavender oil is exported. Their boom product in recent years has been plush bears full of lavender-infused wheat, to use as heat packs. They have a limit of one per person, and elaborate anti-piracy measures so you can register your bear and confirm it is genuine.

I think they are running into the problem of how to be a viable commercial supplier of lavender oil while meeting demand for these bears, and how to be an efficient working farm when they are swamped with visitors at most crucial time of year. I see on their site that they charge $7.50 per head to visit in December and January.

I think most of the visitors are Asian tourists, and there was some forceful home-made signage around to the effect that NO YOU CANNOT TAKE PHOTOS HERE, and a few oblique comments. Cultural diversity is a wonderful thing, but I felt that in this case WE were providing the diversity.

They sell lavender-infused everything. Foods, napery, bath oils and lotions etc. We bought lavender furniture polish, lavender and apple jelly, and a pair of lavender oven mitts. Then we had pancakes with lavender ice cream, and lavender scones.

The large pup was in the car during our visit, so we kept it short; but in truth there was not that much to do and few other visitors clogging up the scone production line. 

The day was turning rainy so when we got back to the shack, we went to the local library in two shifts, and loaded up on books. The rest of the day was spent working our way through them and spinning LPs.

Shacked up in Bridport

Monday

Today we loaded up kids, dog, wave ski and a few clothes, and hit the road. I am writing this on Monday night in a borrowed shack in Bridport. It's feels weird to be on the coast, but not the East Coast or Northwest Coast or even West Coast. We are on the Northeast coast, and it was a torturous drive. We didn't bring a map, and I decided to just drive in to Launceston and follow road signs to get here from Scottsdale, which turns out to be a very rally-driving way to go. Twists and turns. Even just getting through the centre of Launceston and onto the road to Scottsdale is an adventure in randomness. Quite a beautiful drive though. The view from Sideling Lookout over the valley is amazing.

 This is my friend Andrea's family shack. She lives in Perth now so doesn't get here often; her siblings and their friends use it but we managed to get a free timeslot in the school holidays. We are just going to dag around, reading and walking on the beach and maybe having a paddle if we feel brave. Poor Winston is ready to go home. We left him inside here while we went down to the pub for dinner and he practically turned inside out with his leapings when we returned. We have explained that we are here for 4 days and he will hopefully get used to it.

 We have a singing neighbour. He seemed to be practising a song called Thinkin' Bout The Way Things Used To Be, yodelling it across the hillside with a lyric sheet in his hand. When he's happy with his work he finishes with a bit of a "Yoooow!!"

 Tuesday 

 Good night's sleep generally, Winston had a bit of a prowl around inside but went back to his designated 'bed' (old sheet on the floor) when asked to. Our beds are soft and warm and after a busy day that's all I need.

 On the way here yesterday we drove through Scottsdale, and I told the family the story of the 1967 Scottsdale Magpies who won the NTFA premiership, and then the state final. That year there was a Championship of Australia held at Adelaide Oval. Scottsdale were competitive but were outplayed by Subiaco, then met Glenelg in the 3rd place playoff the next day and were belted mercilessly Glenelg 29.27 (201) d Scottsdale 10.8 (68)

After breakfast we went for a long walk with Winston through town along the sandy river flats at low tide. When the Visitors Centre was open we got some maps and had a chat about places to take the dog and the wave ski. The lady in there was on the phone when we arrived, taking advice on whether to fly the flag or not - apparently Governor Peter Underwood passed away overnight. This is sad news, he was a brave supporter of human rights and peace movements. He invited all Amnesty members to a reception at Govt House once, and shook every single hand.

 We came home to the shack for lunch and for me to spin a few more LPs from the collection; I'm really enjoying being reunited with Mad Not Mad by Madness (1985). Then we went off to try to find Adams Beach - we just missed it yesterday. Now fully enmapped, we were able to track it down. A magnificent deserted expanse of sand, with no rocks. Most of the beaches here are hemmed in with huge granite boulders. Marcus and I swam but it was beastly cold. Michael paddled bravely. We walked a pretty long way then turned back and were nearly back to our shoe-pile before we saw anyone else. The surf was too wild for us to put the wave ski in, so hopefully that might happen tomorrow.

The great outdoors

On Sunday I filled in for a friend's proper outdoor soccer team, and played a full 90 minutes out there on real grass. It was fantastic.

 I am currently playing indoor soccer twice a week; competitive league 4-a-side at the cricket centre on Fridays, and casual kickabout no-ref soccer in a school gym on Tuesdays.

Josh, a Balinese guy in our Friday night team, also plays in the Over 35 outdoor league I played in a couple of years back, but he runs around for Beachside. I played then for University, and Marcus now plays for Olympia, so I felt briefly conflicted when I was asked to don the lurid green of Beachside, but I got over it quickly.

Their home ground is Sandown Park, by the beach in Sandy Bay. Marcus played there the other day, and it was horribly waterlogged. Josh and I arrived and saw that it was much worse, covered in standing water. There is another ground which is on a slightly higher level, and looked fine to play on. I asked the other Beachside guys if we might play on that instead; even though this is their home, they seemed to think that was a novel idea.

The referee arrived and inspected the first pitch. It was hilarious. There were, let's say, 25 large puddles. he asked for a ball, and went up and down the ground and attempted to roll a ball through every one. I don't know if there is something in his manual about this. he was so thorough. And every time the ball stopped rolling and started floating, he looked grim and disappointed. he came back and said "Sorry, game's off." He too seemed to think the idea of playing on the other pitch was beyond the pale. Eventually someone bashfully suggested he have a look at it. "Ohhhhh sure, move the nets onto the goals up there and let's do it".

I played left back and had a hoot. There was lots to do; Beachside aren't much good at keeping the ball so there was plenty of defending required. I did my best and made a few nice tackles and passes. Due to a technicality I had best not go into, I was going by the name of 'Brian' for the day. (Weirdly I was telling someone about this today and he said, oh I know Brian, he's married to my wife's cousin.) There was a smattering of "well done Brian" from on and off the field.

I even got on the scoresheet. At the wrong end. There are two kinds of acceptable own goals; the lunge and the deflection. I lunged and got to the ball before my man who was coming in at the far post; but I needed to get some scoop into my lunge -- all I did was foot-punch the ball into my own net.

Apart from that I felt like I did OK and my team-mates were very keen for me to Brian it up again this weekend. The player shortage that led to me being drafted is now worse after a couple of injuries on Sunday, so I think I have a game there any time I want one.

Final score was Hobart Utd 5 d Beachside 0.

MRI at the RCH

On Friday Michael and I went to Melbourne for the day, so he could have an MRI scan at the Royal Children's Hospital. He was born with a heart defect that was corrected by surgery when he was a week old. He has annual checks in Hobart, and every 3 or 4 years goes back to the RCH for more intensive checks. This is make sure his heart is growing as its should, and to see if the scars and slightly stretched vessels are affecting its function. So far so good! He really is a remarkably healthy, resilient and happy little guy, and I can honestly say that I don't think about his heart from one week to the next.

Our state government pays for our costs to undergo procedures like this interstate, when the local system can't provide the specialist people or equipment. Which is a great system – it was a very welcome surprise, hard on the heels of the unwelcome surprise of Michael's diagnosis when was he only hours old.

I always believe its better to be being bored at the airport than frantic on the road, so we had plenty of time to wait. Then a power outage in Sydney delayed our flight by an hour. The low morning sun shines powerfully into the departure lounge at Hobart Airport, so we got out the bits and pieces we had available and did shadow/reflection experiments to pass the time.

We finally got airborne and I started prepping Michael for the quiz I was planning to give him. There was a strong possibility he would need to have a cannula (IV drip) in his hand, to put a contrast agent into his blood for the MRI. This is when I would start asking him tricky flag questions, such as "Which Brazilian state has the word 'nego' on it's flag?"

The lady dozing beside me on the plane while we talked flags opened her eyes to say to Michael "you are a VERY clever boy aren't you?". I told her a bit about him and he answered some fairly detailed questions. She closed by saying "Hmm, Michael Rees. I'll keep my eye out for you Michael".

My plan had been to have lunch and see the resident meerkats at RCH before our appointment, but as we were now an hour behind, we just sped straight there in a cab. I took along my iPad to document the day; Michael had been prevailed upon to write a report on it all for his class, so I was taking pics as memory-joggers for him primarily. He doesn't like having his picture taken.

I was allowed in to sit with him while he was in the scanner. He was very relaxed about it and, as always, very easy to look after. He is the opposite of a drama queen - just keen to be accommodating and cause minimum fuss.

The scan takes about 40 minutes. Kids can choose a movie from a menu (Michael took Ice Age 2) which they can watch using a mirror set-up in the head-cradle thingy. They have audio from the movie and instructions from the operator coming in through the headset as well. They have to hold their breath in, hold it out, etc as commanded. This is quite tricky to master for younger kids, and that's why Michael has not had an MRI up until now (he's 10).

The scanner makes some pretty terrible noises, but not constantly, just intermittently. I had earmuffs, and I watched he movie without sound and dozed. I couldn't speak to Michael so there really wasn't much I could do, but he didn't need me anyway. As it happened they didn't need to stick anything in him, which was a happy result.

Once it was all done they let me stand in the doorway of the MRI suite and get some pics for Michael's report.

So, that was that. We'll get the results at some stage via his cardiologist.

We went up to pay a brief visit to the meerkats and have something to eat. There has been massive upgrade of the hospital since we were last there, in fact I didn't recognise it at all. It used to be that the McDonalds was the most prominent feature of the ground floor. Now there is a small aquarium (but big enough to have at least one shark in it), the meerkat enclosure a number of cafes and a sort of interactive-video-touch-screen-fun-wall, where kids can play Pong-style games but involving their whole bodies. Great idea.

Then we had to summon another cab to get us across to the Melbourne Museum for the 3.15 tour of the Aztecs exhibition. We were running late but the ticket said that's OK as long as you aren't TOO late. While we waited for our cab, someone called my name - it was our friend Andy, a pediatrician who works part of the week at the RCH. She was dropping off some paperwork in the 5 minute parking zone, kids in the car yelling, and so we had a quick catch-up on family news and general goss.

The Aztecs were great! They certainly know how to turn a chunk of basalt into an upsetting icon of the malevolent undead spirits.

This one below reminds me of 1980s swamp-billy band The Gun Club, for some reason.

These perky dudes are actual sacrificial knives, used by priests to cut out the hearts of the unlucky victims. They have human teeth stuck on and eyes made of obsidian and ... white stuff. The spike on the right was used for non-fatal self-mutilation to supply the gods with a bit of extra blood from time to time.

I wish I could recall all of the long Aztec names of the diferent gods. Suffice to say this guy below is offering you some of his liver...

... and this is a mask made a from a real skull. With a knife in its teeth! And googly eyes. Weird enough for ya?

At closing time we scooted out of there and met Dugald Jellie, author, journalist and football blogger, who walked us over to Lygon St for early dinner at his favourite pizza place. He's a terrific fellow who has the happy knack of talking to kids and actually listening to them – which is surprisingly rare.

Dugald even hailed a cab for us. Next thing we knew we were crowded into the tarmac-level hell-basement that is Tullamarine mega-gate 26/27/28/29/30. Having been in a Peruvian bus station during the Festival of San Isidro I felt right at home. The galling thing is the disparity between Gates 1-24 (TV! Tiki bars! Restaurants! Toilets and drinking water!) and the third world downstairs. Never fails to bring me down.

Due to the Sydney shenanigans, we were on a small plane, packed to the gills, and with more legroom than the Peruvian buses but only just. Bumpy slewing takeoff and landing. Delighted to get to our car and hit the road, actually controlling the mode of conveyance. As we turned into South Hobart we counted down the landmarks before home. "Last traffic lights before home ... last cafe ... last pub  ... last turnoff ... HOME!!"

Awkward time of the afternoon

I came upstairs yesterday and the boys were perched on the back of the couch cheek by jowl. Turns out the sun was in their eyes as they tried to watch Adventure Time.

What I did on my holidays (3)

This is about 3 months in the past now, and still I haven’t got around to blogging all of it. I think I will just do these last chapters as photos with captions. Better for all of us really. We borrowed Phillip and Andrea’s car for the day to go to AQWA, and had a freeway adventure just getting there and back. The coastal highway is a little bit CHiPs if anyone else remembers that show.

This is my favourite letterbox I have ever seen anywhere.

This was at AQWA, the fabulous aquarium at Hillary's Boat Harbour, north of Perth. 
I was trying to get the classic ‘just cracked a joke’ expression moray eels have, and didn’t quite nail it.

Baby crocodile. Cute but fangy.

Toadfish, y’all.

Contractually obliged to call this a ‘denizen of the deep’. Sigh.

Sun setting into the sea -that’s worth travelling 3000km to witness. This was our local beach.

Amnesia

I asked Michael today what this meant, and where he got it from. He said it was joke, but nobody got it. And he had just made it up. It’s got a translated-from-ancient-Greek-ness about it. I’ve said it before and I’ll doubtless say it again - he’s unique, that one. But having said that, as his cousin Arthur grows up some very interesting parallels are apparent.

Boys in the paper, again

Our platypus. They look quite a lot like a rock when they are sitting still, but fortunately he was pretty busy.

Marcus and Michael watch the platypus in the rivulet, with Lily and Katherine McShane. Photos by Sharyn Jones.

The other day Nick and Anna and their girls Lily & Katherine came up for lunch. Lately there have been a lot of sightings of a platypus in the Hobart Rivulet – Elf has seen it herself so many times on her way to work that its practically a big yawn to her now. Nevertheless, she thought we should take the visitors and Winston for a walk down there to see if we could locate the little monotreme.

We did - this was made easier by the presence of a photographer squatting on the bank, giving him the once over with the long lens. She was delighted to get some human interest involved, and so the kids stayed on the bank for about 15 minutes watching him very close up, while they were snapped from all angles.

The story in the newspaper is here, and West Hobart mother of two, Anna Berger, even got in with a nice quote. 

We did think though – doesn't that picture of the kids look a bit Photoshopped? The edge of Michael’s shadow is flat and perfectly vertical. Odd.

Bad dog

One very stormy night, with the power of panic, Winston worked out he could get in through the cat door. Since then he has done it regularly whenever he is left at home and the door is not blocked. I set up the iPad to catch him, so we could see how he does it. This clip shows his eventual success after about 12 attempts.

Ketchup

Time for a catch-up blog. I will go through the family one by one.

Elf is working virtually full-time until at least the end of June. She is coping OK with that. She really enjoys her current boss. She feels much more appreciated for the amazing range of skills she has and her no-fuss way of just getting things done. Elf is the family gardener and the continuing lack of rain is an irritant, but I secretly think she enjoys spending an hour out there in the evening just hosing.

I have had three months of very little work in the freelance design world. Several mooted projects were put on ice, and combined with the usual summer downturn it has been a pretty thin time. Elf took on extra hours as a consequence. Work is now starting to cascade from everywhere, which is a relief. You do wish it would even out a bit though.

I had one karma moment which signified the turnaround. A client I worked with last year rang, and I was pretty disappointed when instead of a design job, she wanted me to meet and mentor a young designer, for free of course. I said yes, but actually had to borrow cash from Elf to cover the cost of two coffees. So I didn’t go into it feeling like Mr. Successful Designer With A Lot To Offer. During our one-hour meeting I had contact from two new clients. [One located across the road from the cafe I was in at the time]. This after 3 months of tumbleweeds blowing through my office. Since then almost everything on-hold has come off-hold and various new projects have been sprung on me. 

I am starting a new design/blogging project collaborating with Dugald Jellie, who last year blogged Richmond’s footy season under the name Tiger Tiger Burning Bright. Stand by for details when we launch in time for Round 2. Yeah, well we are playing Gold Coast away in Round 1 so it hardly counts, alright?

Michael is doing a maths extension program at the Uni each Friday. He has finally got his way and we are canning his guitar lessons after the one today. He’s more of a piano guy. He is making beautiful music on it, and his guitar teacher suggested we just expose him to as much piano music as possible. Michael had a fantastic day at the school athletics carnival - he has finally accepted that it is important to participate as much as possible. He went in just about everything, and won his 200m and the sack race, as usual. He has a 100% record in sack races, usually winning by half the length of the track.

Marcus is now settled in at a new soccer club, Hobart Olympia. It’s a bit remote by local standards; but then again on Sunday I broke my previous best and got us there from home in 13 minutes. So – not really that far. He played his first game of the year on Sunday, wearing the blue of Olympia after about 110 games for South Hobart and Central Region, all in red, going back to 2008. So that was weird.

He is recovering well from the cactus incident. High school has been undemanding yet interesting enough for him so far. He just got an A+ on his first Chinese test. He will be learning the flute, and has been given one of Imp’s two(!) Jacki was also a junior flautist so there is some pedigree behind the lad. Time to start playing some Jethro Tull.

Footy predictions 2014

For once I have got to this before the season is already half over. I am seeing Hawthorn as minor premiers, going into the Grand Final as favourites and getting rolled by Geelong. Richmond will be top 4 for much of the season then fade. But this year they will win a final.

1. Geelong
2. Hawthorn
3. Freo
4. Sydney
5. North
6. Richmond
7. Essendon
8. Collingwood
9. West Coast
10. Adelaide
11. Gold Coast
12. Carlton
13. Western Bulldogs
14. Port Adelaide
15. St Kilda
16. Melbourne
17. Greater Western Sydney
18. Brisbane

Brownlow Medal: Nate Fyfe

Coleman Medal: Jeremy Cameron, GWS, 66

Grand Final: Geelong d Hawthorn